The Possum Whisperer

28 October 2008

Coming into Bryan, Texas, my sister arranged for me to stay with her friend's family south of town. I called Kathy, who after assuring that I wasn't an axe murderer, and giving me strict instructions on how to kill her if I were, generously offered her home.

I arrived. We chatted. She gave me some fantastic spinach cornbread. She'd ask for details on the trip. "You're nuts," she would say.

She showed me a little doll-sized baby bottle. "Guess what animal this is for." I hazarded ridiculous guesses.

"A parakeet?"

"What kind of answer is that? Karli! This guy thinks it's for a parakeet!"

"An iguana?"

"Now he thinks it's for an iguana!" she announced to her family tauntingly.

"Um, a mouse?" This answer was apparently more acceptable, though still incorrect. My three guesses expired. It was for a squirrel, one of a long line of rodents and other animals that Kathy has rehabilitated. The squirrel was named Tina, because Hurricane Ike knocked her out of her tree. Kathy also had a possum. When you see them in full light, possums are much cuter, though still in a skeletal sort of way. She tried to get me to take him.

"Imagine how awesome you would look riding into Austin with a possum on your shoulder." I admit, this would have been very cool. "You'd be the best uncle ever if you showed up to your niece and nephews with a possum." Also very true, but maybe not the best brother. She let the possum roam around a little. He was very gentle and shy. I would definitely take him once I had my own place. She brought out Tina as well. This she-squirrel was feisty. She would stand on her hind legs and box with Kathy's husband, then scamper wildly.

Kathy asked me more about the ride. I'd give her some details, and she would declare my insanity. "How many miles? You are nuts." The squirrel ran up her shoulder, onto her head, rustled through her hair, and down the other side. "You'd sleep in city parks?! You're crazy," she said definitively. The squirrel jumped from her knee onto my back, climbed down my leg and thought about running up into my shorts, before leaping back to Kathy and burrowing inside her shirt.

"You are a loony," she would say.

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